What Are You Looking At?

Photo by Tachina Lee at Unsplash

Last week we talked about where it is best to look from. The Divine Matrix is the synergetic alchemy of using the head, heart, and gut-brain systems to use Divine Intelligence, our feelings, and Divine Wisdom and inspiration to reveal, transcend, and achieve in life.

Today, I want to talk about what we are looking at? What are we observing? Are we looking at trouble - with a capital T, and that rhymes with P, which makes you a fool? Are we looking at limitations or infinite possibilities?

Spiritual growth is the act of letting go of any ideas, beliefs, and attachments that no longer serve us, like shoulda/woulda/coulda's, yeah-but's, and “I don't deserve it” junk thinking. When we are consistently focused on those kinds of ideas, we are not only not letting go of them, we are seeing everything through the lens or the perspective of that junk thinking.

New job interview? Thoughts surrounding you may be “they won't like me," or "I shoulda gotten that degree.”

New love relationship? Thoughts popping up could be “yeah, but something's gotta be wrong with him/her/they, it always is.”

New idea in your career, for the world, or creatively? Thoughts swirling in your head may include “Why bother, I never follow through.”

Those words and phrases are red flags about your belief system, your perspective on that activity, and what is getting in your way. So let's first look at letting go.

Forgiveness for errors, injustices, or debts

This is something that has gotta happen to allow space in the head and the energy you exude. Remember forgiving is not condoning. Forgiving is the release of those limiting ideas' hold on your perspective. When we practice radical forgiveness, we are awakening ourselves to our highest, most capable self. It emancipates us from discord, making room for a greater good to be expressed or received, for change to take place, and for healing.

Spiritual Law tells us that spiritual growth cannot take place until we are open to learning, till we awaken to catching Spirit’s ideas about what we need to let go, and allowing the removal of obstacles and impediments which fog our way of living. As we let go, so too will Spirit’s highest ideas then be able to reveal themselves more frequently and powerfully. We forgive and let go to create openness and spaciousness so the Universe can release into our consciousness the greater idea, the best perspective.

When we look from our Divine Matrix, and embrace Spirit’s highest ideas and let go of the untruths and release the Truth, we automatically make room for being lifted out of wrong tendencies, discord, and illness. 

Our job is to ask Spirit what needs to be revealed to us and our work is to be still, listen to the voice within, and follow its guidance. 

Can we successfully release and let go of beliefs, ideas, and limitations without embracing their replacement? While we may see what to let go of and sometimes dig into it a bit for clarity, what we want to look at is the replacement of that belief.

Where your attention goes, energy flows, and manifestation then follows.

When we:

1)  Put our conscious attention on asking for Spirit’s highest vision of what needs to be let go;

2)  Keep our attention on this question long enough to receive the visionary insight on what needs to be allowed in and what we must awaken to; we then 

3)  Manifest our vision by committing to embrace the conscious and creative stages, in mind and action, of this intuited information.

When your attention goes to the possibilities, your energy flows from the intuited Divine nature, and your manifestations then come pure and clean.

Ignorance stays with us until the day of enlightenment, until our vision toward the Spirit broadens and casts out the image of a no longer useful littleness…. The will should hold it in place until the creative genius of the inner life transforms the image of limitation and transmutes it into liberty under law.   ~Ernest Holmes

Are you looking at the possibilities or the limitations? 

Have you heard of Bethany Hamilton's story? At the age of 13 as a rising surf star, Bethany lost her left arm to a 14-foot tiger shark, seemingly ending her dream career. However, through a foundation of faith, determination, and passion, one month after the attack, Bethany returned to surfing and within two years had won her first national title. At 17 years old, she realized her dream of surfing professionally and is an active surf competitor to this day, currently competing in the World Surf League tour events and other special events. In 2016, Bethany beat a six-time world champion and the top-ranked surfer in the world. In 2017, she was inducted into the Surfer’s Hall of Fame. 

Bethany sees her passion for surfing as a gift from God and is what compelled her to go back to the sport against all odds. She is constantly re-writing the supposed rules of logic, what's possible, and living her greatest life. Her story is dramatized in the movie ”Soul Surfer” based on her book of the same title, and her perspective of the incident is shown in the docs “Heart of Soul Surfer,” and “Unstoppable” along with her many other books like “Be Unstoppable” and the children's tale, “Unstoppable Me.” Bethany reminds us:  I don't need easy, I just need possible.

While it is not always easy to let go of our troubles or give up the things we resent and regret, when we connect what we are looking through with what we are looking at, we listen to Spirit’s highest ideas on what needs to be released and forgiven. And we:

• Live to be present
• Look for things to be grateful for each day
• Set boundaries to protect the important things
• Say no to the excess stuff or doing too much
• Aim to use time wisely to include sweet moments and see a world of possibilities.
• It's our daily choices that determine our outcomes.

With repetition, we’ll catch more insights and habitually expand our vision/mission/purpose. There’s a spiritual solution to every problem/condition. Stress, illness, or trauma might crack us, but it doesn't have to end us.

There is an ancient Japanese art called Kintsugi or golden joinery. It is a technique using a lacquered or resin-based gold dust for repairing broken pottery with seams of gold.  We can use a spiritual version of this practice through our Divine Matrix to repair any damage.

Are you looking at old stories or creating new ones?

Are you having a vision or dream that just floats around or are you envisioning and embodying it in the Divine Matrix?

Here is a process to see what shame and/or regret you may have that is fogging up everything you are looking at in mind and body, family and love relationships, community, friends, money and work, and in your connection to Higher Self and Source. Each piece of shame and regret story has 4 steps:

1. Summary of the shame and/or regret story
2. When did it happen (beginning and ending time)
3. Where did it happen
4. What were the deeper consequences of what you did and how did this affect your relationship with yourself and your life now? This step is the one to dig deep into.

When you have finished writing down (best with pen and paper) your Shame and Regret list, keep it safe from anyone else except a trusted friend, counselor, therapist, spiritual practitioner, or spiritual leader to who you will later read this. When you do choose the one person you will share the list with, please remind yourself to not allow any justifications to arise and to not solicit or allow any judgment, good or bad from the one you are reading this to. This process is only about communication with a trusted other and the openness to let it go. The release comes through the non-judged venting, to get it out of our heads both as a story and the energy it carried. When we have our ethics and integrity 'squeaky clean, we open up to receiving in a huge way and step into living our life large and free and powerful! 

Declare what your new story is NOW. 

When you look around you, what are you looking at?

• Are you looking at agitation or serenity? What you expect, you'll receive.
• Are you looking at a “woe is me” life or a “wow is me” life? Living life with wonderment and creativity is remembering that the power of You is essential no matter your age.
• Are you looking at the reflection of a victim or victor? The pain of any sort of trauma is not necessarily eliminated in this work, it is neutralized and replaced. To release and let go is to neutralize the pain from the old event and its hold on your perspective of life.
• Are you looking at practicalities or possibilities? Living with an attitude of being practical may feel safe, but understanding the infinite possibilities the Universe has available will expand your outlook, opportunities, success, and happiness.

Remove “impossible” from your vocabulary. The art of the possible tells us that we take our options and make the best of them. And our options are limited only by how we look at things. So become a wiser, stronger, more evolved human being by filling your cup / your mind with what you want to attract. Focus on that, not the old stories.

Then what are you looking at is...

a joyous, rich, succulent, fun, loving, peaceful, happy, and vibrant life.

Affirmative Incantation:  

I release.

I let go.

And I let the Divine in me inform, inspire, regulate and interpret all my dreams and desires.

Through the eye of any storm, I stand steady and nimble like the olive tree, in the zone of awakened awareness, and with Spirit-empowered readiness to take on all that steps into my life with ease and grace. My intellect, compassion, and instincts are handy and ripe with the smartest and most loving choices...the best choices for this day.

In this moment, and the next ones hereafter, I rise to my highest Self, confident of my fitness, goodwill, and willingness to be in my prime, vibrating at the speed of the Divine.

Who's Got The Coolest Looking Egg?

What is Easter About?  Ascension, Atonement, resurrection, rebirth, suffering, eggs, death, transmutation, transformation, transition, betrayal, blessing, bunnies, release, revelation, contemplation, crucifixion, chocolate, sacrifice, immortality and probably more
                        ...that's 20 ideas to explore.  #1...

Resurrection is a much talked about subject during this time. After much deliberation this week, I wonder if there is even something we need to resurrect? That implies something was dead. If some good has disappeared from your consciousness, it is not dead, it is misplaced or ignored. And can be found by *looking sharp* at the Truth and then living it.

Yeshua delivered a powerful blessed message, the culmination of his ministry, which basically tells us that each person has an immortal Divine power working within them, a Kingdom of Heaven, you might say. And yet, 2000+ years later, through much suffering, have we got it yet? Are we, like the Hebrews with Moses and the Jews of Jesus' time, not listening to this basic Truth. Are we hearing, yet not embodying? The Great Example (Jesus/Yeshua) had to make a great and dramatic sacrificial example (the Crucifixion) and still many didn't get the crux of his ministry.

It has been said that “You can't have a resurrection without a crucifixion..nor a betrayal.” I get the sentiment and metaphor, especially today. It's about forgiveness of our self-betrayal (Judas), our bad choices of ideas and people we allowed in or offered to stay with us over too long a period of time. It's about transmuting to a new level of consciousness, yes, I get that, but crucifixion?  Crucifixion was a punishment, usually done naked, intended to provide a death that was particularly slow, painful, gruesome, humiliating, and public. The word, excruciating means "out of crucifying." Again, I know it's a metaphor, however, do we really want to go through that? even metaphorically? the ...no pain, no gain attitude? Not necessary, I say!

I understand sometimes a transformation can be painful, especially as we sometimes must step into the dark to get to the light, but do we want to invite this idea of an excruciating release? Maybe that's why the bunnies and chocolate are present in this holiday, to sweeten up the process.

The symbolic language of the crucifixion is the death of the old paradigm; resurrection is a leap into a whole new way of thinking.   ~Deepak Chopra

And yes, per Bible, the apostles didn't get It till following the June. 49 days days after Easter, 50 days after Passover, at the start of  Shavuot, the celebration of the beginning of the wheat harvest and the  end of the barley harvest, and commemorating the deliverance of the Torah from Mt. Sinai. It is the Pentacost, when the descent of ruach ha kodesh (the spirit of the holiness) upon apostles occured.

Okay maybe they had to meditate on things a bit, both were big events. For the Israelites during the Passover story, there was freedom from slavery, crossing the Red Sea, the deliverance of the 10 Commandments and forty years of "wandering," that might have distracted them. In the Easter story, even after three years of his ministry, the trial and crucifixion, Mary Magdalene and the rock, the resurrection, Yeshua and Doubting Thomas at the meeting...a lot of drama to distract from the Divine within. But do we have to wait till June to get it, apply it, and be it?  No! There is no line and no waiting!

And I don't want to kill or crucify my limiting beliefs in order to resurrect the Divine Me. I want to replace them. There is nothing to resurrect, only reveal what is already there, alive in me. Maybe I am playing hide-n-seek with it. This is about revelation and unfoldment:

In the unfoldment of the spiritual mind there are periods when the ideas that we have meditated on, and accepted as true, spring forth into consciousness, becoming living realities in our life instead of mere mental concepts. In this awakening we get the fruits of the ideas that we have planted in our mind; we have escaped from darkness (Egypt) and have entered into light (Promised Land). ~Charles Fillmore

Does something have to die before we can live? Replaced, yes, but not necessarily die. I believe it is  an act of busting through like the when a plant breaks through the seed, a chick breaks through the egg, and a butterfly breaks through the cocoon. It's a transmutation...breaking out of one’s shell, comfort zone, old ways of being/believing, and then emerging into the New Thought.

Now, I get that there may be a transition period,  thought most want to move quickly through and ascend into that new way of thinking. But it is in the transition, the liminal space, the at-one-ment time, or the contemplative neutral zone where our soul and consciousness readies itself for our next expression. Shortchanging this process can lead to repeating old patterns and mistakes. But we don't have to wait for Passover to get free in the City of Peace, the power of your I Am will redeem and uplift your consciousness through the power of the Christ Spirit in you. It will overwhelm and replace ideas impoverished by thoughts of weakness, barrenness, and lack for that which is prosperous, creative, full of Light, vitality, and love. Sometimes you may have to get in the mud, get dirty to get through this transition period...go ahead. Remember:

No Mud, no Lotus    ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Again, there is no need to kill or crucify. Transform yourself through the reveal of the Divine in you by busting through the shell, the seed, or the cocoon. I don't want you to change, that's an external event. I want you to transition and transform...internally. And, if you must resurrect, do so in the revelation of your Divine nature from the memory of It being already there within.

The moment you stand up and claim your divinity,
Christ is reborn within your heart, Buddha rejoices,
Mohammed dances upon the mountaintop,
Lao Tzu winks approvingly
And the Promise of the Tree of Life is Fulfilled.
And I know that the hand of God is the promise of my own,
And I know that the spirit of God is the brother of my own
And that all the men ever born are also my brothers,
And the women my sisters…     ~ Walt Whitman

Say aloud:

I Reveal respect and love, not fear.

I Reveal a graceful and centered calm, not chaos.

I Reveal health and vitality, not hurt.

I speak the language of the I AM

I transform my consciousness to my highest expression.

I Am a vibrant Light.

I Am a Life of Joy and Beauty.

I Am a Loving presence.

And I Am a Wise creation; prosperous in all ways.

I Am now resurrected in mind, heart, and soul.

I Am energized, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, and ready to rock and roll.


Who's Got the coolest looking egg?  You....you....and you!

Start Cracking!

Affirmation
I Reveal the Divinity in Me.
I Reveal respect and love, not fear. I Reveal a graceful and centered calm, not chaos. I Reveal health and vitality, not hurt. I speak the language of the I AM and transform my attitude, my perception, my belief, and my consciousness to the idea that I Am openly experiencing the highest expression of my greatness. I Am a vibrant Light. I Am a Life of Joy and Beauty. I Am a Loving presence. And I Am a Wise creation; prosperous in all ways. I Am resurrected in mind, heart, imagination and intuition; assured in everything I do.
I Am energized, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, and ready to rock and roll.

Take A Dive

We see ourselves rightly only when we see the Self that is in all. No one can have a real or lasting joy and happiness stored up for oneself alone, everything is meant to be shared.    ~Ernest Holmes

Last year, Patte and I were out at sea...on a cruise. It was my first cruise and four themes came up:

1) Movement towards somewhere
The month of October's theme was falling forward. We are always at movement and falling forward is our natural movement.

2) Abundance of opportunities and being provided for
If you haven't been on a cruise before, the journey offers you all you can eat, gamble, swim, buy, dance, and be entertained. You just have to be present and willing to receive … you just have to show up. Now all is available but not all is given. There's a map and a timetable, but you have to get yourself there ... you must walk the talk of your desire.

It is impossible for you to receive that which your mind refuses to accept. If you desire to receive more you need to consciously develop the ability to mentally encompass it. You make your life mean, little, and limit its possibilities when you refuse to accept the whole gift of God. ~Ernest Holmes, Thoughts Are Things 

3) Life is an adventure
Went zip-lining – reminders: ...strap in and take the leap or hike ...options: rappel, take the ladder or climb wall

God is Life and Life gives Itself to us. It does not give some of Itself, It gives all of Itself. But the gift without a receiver cannot complete itself in individual life. ~ Ernest Holmes, Living the Science of Mind 

And we went snorkeling ...you have to get in the water, with equipment, ...receiving the beauty that is within ...share the food (ourselves) and watch fish come

4) Receiving is as Important as Giving
Not taking....receiving

Until we can receive with an open heart, we're never really giving with an open heart. When we attach judgment to receiving help, we knowingly or unknowingly attach judgment to giving help. ~Brene Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection Receiving is as Important as Giving  

For some it is hard to receive. They say or think, “You shouldn’t have” or “I don’t deserve this” or “This old thing, I’ve had it forever.” When you accept without qualifications, you honor the other person's flow of giving and abundance, as you receive abundance. Giving and receiving not just spiritual idea - survival ...photosynthesis: we exhale carbon dioxide which nourishes plants ...plants use carbon dioxide and release oxygen -necessary for our life ...28% rainforests, 70% marine plants

Every breath is making a difference for all life by this giving and receiving ...is ultimate source of our continued abundance ...awareness shows the Universe we are living a prosperity consciousness Generosity and gratitude is living with arms wide open ….like photosynthesis - free to give and free to receive automatically ...is ultimate of embracing the gifts of life ...recognizes Something greater than we are, infinite and available, is the Source of all that we have, give and receive The magic word here, is living in gratitude.

Rudyard Kipling was a very famous writer late 1800's, early 1900's, and made a great deal of money at his trade. Wrote Jungle Book, Gunga Din, The Man Who Would Be King. A newspaper reporter came up to him once and said, "Mr. Kipling, I just read that somebody calculated that the money you make from your writings amounts to over $100 a word." Mr. Kipling raised his eyebrows and said, "Really, I certainly wasn't aware of that." The reporter cynically reached into his pocket and pulled out a $100 bill and gave it to Kipling and said, "Here's a $100 bill Mr. Kipling. Now you give me one of your $100 words." Rudyard Kipling looked at that $100 bill for a moment, took it and folded it up and put it in his pocket and said, "Thanks.” 

Everything in life works in circles, spiritually and materially. While there is more attention on how to give, the consciousness of receiving is just as important ...it is a mutual experience, reflecting our unity with each other and with Spirit. You don't have to be out at sea to notice all that is being offered to you and meet it with openness and gratitude. Meditate on what it means to receive; and, in that, the gift you give to others by receiving generously. It's one of the ways we keep on singing. 

Affirmation 

Today I know with all confidence... 

A glorious Divine abundance is active in my life. My prosperity comes through the source and substance of my supply...SPIRIT ...all Knowing, all Being, all Love, and all Giving. I dedicate my mind and heart to the thoughts, feelings, beliefs and actions that honor this glorious Divine abundance. Knowing it comes from an inexhaustible supply, I joyously receive my bounty right now. I live, breath and thrive in the flow of my bountiful Good.

An Ethical Morality

Archaeologists in France discovered traces of copper wire located in a thousand year old cave and announced it was really a French scientist who invented the telephone. Upon hearing this, British archaeologists told of traces of plastic in a 2,000 year old cave and declared an English scientist had discovered fiber optic cable 2,000 years ago. Not to be outdone, Israeli archaeologists laughed as they told of investigating a 5,000 year old cave where they found nothing...declaring ancient Jews had discovered wireless communications 5,000 years ago.

Our best communications are wireless, voiceless and use no plastic. They are communications in thought, feeling, belief and action. No words need be said aloud ... being is the key. But what is being? You could describe it as your nature or essence. "Great," you might say, "what is our nature, our essence?"

A lot of things are inherent in life - change, birth, death, aging, illness, accidents, calamities, and losses of all kinds - but these events don't have to be the cause of ongoing suffering. Yes, these events cause grief and sadness, but grief and sadness pass, like everything else, and are replaced with other experiences. The ego, however, clings to negative thoughts and feelings and, as a result, magnifies, intensifies, and sustains those emotions while the ego overlooks the subtle feelings of joy, gratitude, excitement, adventure, love, and peace that come from Essence. If we dwelt on these positive states as much as we generally dwell on our negative thoughts and painful emotions, our lives would be transformed. ~Gina Lake, What About Now?  Reminders for Being in the Moment

Our essence is interwoven with the Divine. We express this essence through personality and volition.

The true essence of who you are, balances itself upon a cushion of purity, benevolence, and holiness. ~Garey Gordon, The Values Pursued Life: Excellence and Greatness from Within

So, it begs the question, is our Divine Nature ethical or moral? Let's get some definitions on the table, first. Ethics are a code or rule of right or wrong. Morals are a personal ideas of right and wrong which comes from ones conscience. The Science of Mind and other New Thought philosophies are not guilt-based or rooted in a rigid set of rules. They teach an alignment with our true nature of divinity, and respect and recognition of divinity in others. This way of life is holistic, stemming from a matrix of mind, heart and intuition/imagination. It's not about what to think, but how to think!

"How to think, what do mean by that? And what is this "Being" thing?" Maybe this will help:

You don't be happy - you Be joyful

Happy is an experience, joy is the essence of our nature. Joy comes from an intentional connection to all that is in creation.

You don't be learning - you Be transcendent 

Evolving in the revelation of knowledge learned and experienced, especially in "aha" moments and spiritual practices, is a transcendent transformation of you.

You don't be smart - you Be wise 

Knowledge and intellect never override intuition. Intuition, always constructive, is a knowledge-gift sourced from the Divine.

You don't be surviving - you Be on purpose 

Instead of playing the averages or statistics, let's live with intention and deep meaning. Instead of a lackadaisical, rudderless existence, let's be empowered by a purpose. One that gives, as well as, receives.

You don't be thoughtful - you Be the Thinker 

Don't just be part of the creation - Be a creator.

You don't be an exploration - you Be an explorer 

What do you Be? What is your nature?!? The essence of being is our enactment of our Divine nature

The Science of Mind is reaching out to a truer concept of God, immanent in the universe as the very substance, law and life of all that is. The difference between the older way of thinking and the new is that we have come to see that the One Supreme Cause and Source of all that exists, is not a separate Being outside His world, but is in fact the actual Spirit of Life shining through all creation as its very Life Principle, infinite in Its working and eternal in Its essence. ~Ernest Holmes, How to Change Your Life

The title of this blog is An Ethical Morality. And that is conduct which is becoming of your authentic self. But how is this done?  Let's look at two ways:

1) Stay in integrity with your own divine nature. People feel conflicted by two potential courses of action. Unfortunately, most focus too much and too often on the fallacy that outward choices come first. Then they attempt to reason their way back to the greater truth. Like a politician who says what he sees as the 'in' thing or lie to opine, then when caught in this falsehood or a change it public opinion, has to walk back that opine, speaks out of a lack of integrity and authenticity. Instead, if  we focus on aligning with our own highest nature and what represents the greatest in all concerned, then we can allow choices to move from the greater truth and lead to the natural actions that flow from Divine Intelligence.

Right action will be compelled through right knowing. Therefore, when we know the Truth, It will compel us to act in a correct manner. The Science of Mind

2) Non-judgment opens us up to allow divine love and wisdom to be the guiding light for inspired moral action and to see people and situations as they are, rather than through our own biases. Divine Love invokes our compassion, brings warmth to our choices, decisions, and actions and Divine Wisdom grounds us in our intuitive discernment of the situation, moving from clarity of sight to pragmatic action, inspire, motivated and moved from love and wisdom, not fear.

Our essence is a Divine discontent. Like the Universe, we are bred to spread, ever-expand, and journey to an adventurous life. While we do so, let's do it with an ethical morality.  I invite you to be bold and courageous, go the distance with your creativity, find truly enlightened, intuited solutions and actions; and move from seeking comfort, to seeking Divine right action. Seek a sincere inquiry into Truth, removed from fear and personal bias.  Lift your gaze to a higher consistent standard of Truth. It will lift us all into the more expansive possibilities of the soul, where graceful living thrives.

Affirmation 
I Am Living Gracefully
I move with simple elegance, showing my Divine Self with honor, dignity, and kindness; as well as respecting the Divine Self in others. I have goodwill for all, sharing compassion and benevolence to those in need. I know I Am held in the hands of grace, safe in the arms of Love, and rejuvenated, strengthened and enlightened all day.
I Live This Day in Grace!

Stress Is Our Friend

Stress Is Our Friend....Whaaaat?

Watching some TED Talks last week and came across one with psychologist Kelly McGonical. In it she taught showed the participants how stress can be our friend. We've been told, I've told you, that stress makes you sick anywhere from the common cold to cardiovascular disease. The release of cortisol makes the heart rate goes up and the blood vessels constrict.  Something quite unhealthy in a prolonged state...usually. But what if you changed your perspective on stress? What if you chose to think and feel differently about stress? Could your body react to your belief and thus make stress be your friend? The answer is yes.

In 2011, the Health Psychology magazine published an 8 year study by Dr. Lauren Wisk and her colleagues that tracked 30K US adults. They asked the group, “How much stress have you experienced in the last year?” And, “Do you believe that stress is harmful to your health?" Then they tracked these people using the public death records to discover who died. Those who reported a lot of stress and believed stress greatly impacted their health, had a 43% increased risk of premature death. I took a look at the study and their conclusion was that when you change your mind about stress, you can change your body’s response to stress. As Hans Selye, a well-known endocrinologist and stress research expert, said, "It's not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it."

What happens to the body when there is stress? Well, it lowers dopamine levels, a chemical that signals the brain for motivation, feelings of pleasure, and happiness and increases cortisol levels, a chemical that triggers the body to produce epinephrine which affects cognitive performance. And this is very interesting:  in the brain, the hypothalamic–pituitary–adrenocortical  axis (HPA), which regulates the release of cortisol, cannot distinguish the difference between a physical or psychological stressor; thus a psychological stressor can produce a physiological response as much as a physical stressor. So the belief (psychology) that stress creates illness or death, prolongs and worsens the physiological aspects. But the belief (psychology) of stress as a clue to take action, decreases or eliminates the negative physiological aspects of the condition.

You are braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. ~Christopher Robin

How does my belief change the physiological conditions of stress. Well, your belief in stress as a help to a situation vs. a hindrance and danger to your health, will bend the reality of the ravages of cortisol, etc. by knowing and informing the brain that it is time for another hormonal release to occur …. oxytocin, the cuddle hormone.

Here's an experiment Kelly McGonigal did with the TEDX audience. It is a Social Stress Test. Imagine you are giving a five-minute impromptu speech on your personal weaknesses and that there's a panel of expert evaluators in the audience. Remember, you are on a stage with bright lights and a camera in your face. All the audience have been trained to give you discouraging, non-verbal feedback...hemming and hawing, sighing, moving around in their seats, etc. What would that be like for you...telling your deepest, darkest secrets onstage, lights a-blaring and a camera filming you, while an audience does practically everything to show their boredom and disappoint, but boo and heckle you. Pretty demoralizing, yes?

Now how about taking a math test? We're going to all do this together and it's going to be fun...but not for you. I want you to count backwards from 996 in increments of seven. Do this out loud and as fast as you can...starting with 996.....Go! Come on, go faster. Faster please. You're going too slow!!
Stop. Stop, stop, stop. You made a mistake. We are going to have to start all over again. Imagine that scenario. Feel a little stressed out...heart pounding., breathing faster, maybe breaking out into a sweat? Normally that would equal anxiety, signs we aren't coping with the pressure.

But what if you viewed them as signs that body was being energized, preparing you to meet the challenge at hand? Well, that's what participants were told in study at Harvard University. Before they took the social stress test above, they were taught to think the usual stress response as helpful to them. That the pounding heart was the body prepping for action. That your breathing faster meant more oxygen was going to the brain. The participants who learned to view the stress response as helpful were less stressed out, less anxious, and more confident. The usual physical stress response of constricted blood vessels stayed relaxed and the heart pounding became like the hearts response while in joy or courage. It was the oxytocin.

Oxytocin is a stress hormone. The pituitary gland pumps this stuff out as part of the stress response and, like adrenaline, it makes your heart pound. Interestingly, this stress hormone, when released, motivates you to seek support. It's biology nudging you to tell someone how you feel. When life is difficult, this hormone wants you to be surrounded by people who care about you, primes you to do things that strengthen close relationships, and makes you become more compassionate and caring. Oxytocin acts on the body, too. It protect your cardiovascular system from the effects of stress, is a natural anti-inflammatory, helps your blood vessels stay relaxed during stress, helps the heart cells regenerate and heal from any stress-induced damage, and actually strengthens your heart muscle.

Here are a few activities (not including sex and childbirth) that naturally raise oxytocin levels:
1.  10 Hugs a day
2.  Playing with animals
3.  Playing games
4.  Guided meditation
5.  Getting a massage
6.  Dancing or Exercise
7.  Sharing a meal
8.  Soaking in the tub
9.  Give gifts/notes of encouragement/appreciation
10.  Laughing
11.  Karaoke
12.  Talk with positive people
13.  Holding Hands / Love

Your choice in how you perceive the stress equals how you receive the stress

Winston Churchill tells the story of an old man who, on his deathbed, said that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened. I think of stress as a message from the Universe, through your hormonal response in stressful situations or lifestyles, to get in touch with your heart. After all, a compassionate heart creates social connection and more oxytocin release.

We don't want cortisol streaming through our bodies, unless we need to lift a car or are being chased by a lion or tiger or bear. But we do want to bend the reality of stress and cortisol to not mean death, illness or destruction of our immune system, and to mean the reality of stress and oxytocin equals motivation and courage, and choosing love and compassion.

Make stress your friend. Take a breath, take a moment and take back your stress response. It's your decision!



Affirmation
I AM OPENING
My heart is ready to receive the insight I require with ease and love. From this moment on, I transform all my thoughts, feelings and beliefs into a powerful prosperous party. I celebrate my ability to bend reality for my greatest good, best life and optimized fabulousness. I am open to any inspiration, suggestion, revelation, influence, genius and vision that reveals how to bust through, soar and zoom.
I AM OPEN AND ATTENTION IS PAID

When Going Backward Is Going Forward

In the Spirit of starting from the back to go forward, here is how the blog ends:

You Are Powerful, Capable, Always at Choice, Open and Ready, 

Operating at the Speed of the Divine

Why the paradox of going backward to go forward?

There is a psychotherapy concept, asreculer pour mieux sauter:  going backward to be able to leap forward better. It is the process of going backward to your beginnings, whether you do it on your own, in a support group, or with the help of a psychotherapist, practitioner, healer, etc. which can, in effect, give you a running start when you turn around to go forward again.

When do we do that successfully?
1) With palindromes – backwards & forwards are same like with racecar, civic, deified, kayak, level, madam, noon, radar, refer, sagas, solos, tenet, and wow.
2)  In grief, like through a memorial or life celebration. They are full of memories which, in there reminiscence, assist in healing the grief.
3)  Living a life full of gratitude. Gratitude is the knowing and acceptance of past experience in the now.

In this process, asreculer pour mieux sauter,  you step into what Friar Richard Rohr calls, liminal space. From Living on the Edge, his Center for Action and Contemplation meditation blog, he tells us:

Liminal space (from the Latin limen for "threshold") is an inner state and sometimes an outer situation where we can begin to think and act in genuinely new ways. It is when we are betwixt and between, having left one room or stage of life but not yet entered the next. We often enter liminal space when our former way of being is challenged or changed--perhaps when we lose a job or a loved one, during illness, engagement, or at the birth of a child. During this graced time we are not certain or in control. This openness allows room for something genuinely new to happen. We are empty and receptive--an erased tablet waiting for new words. Liminal space is where we are most teachable.

An example in literature and popular culture is like the time between the murder of Bruce Wayne’s parents and his becoming Batman. Or in Star Wars, during Luke Skywalker’s apprenticeship with Yoda in the swamps of Dagobah. Or in the classics like PRIDE AND PREJUDICE, the time between Elizabeth Bennet’s realization she likes Mr. Darcy and the moment she agrees to marry him.

Liminal space is where we transform, sometimes radically, and reveal and reorganize our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs about things, thus our actions and experiences. Rites of passage are liminal spaces. Examples are going off to college, a bar mitzvah, a marriage, getting fired or laid off or death. My move in with Patte was a liminal space time. The decisions of her stuff, my stuff...what stays, what goes to the trash, recycling, storage. And closet space...I lost on that one.

Some are daunting challenges, destructive & chaotic; a time when we feel heartbroken and lost, must start over, or have that fearful "NOW WHAT?" in our heads. You ever feel like life is making you go backwards...in heels. An extra difficult position for most men. That phrase, "backwards in heels," originated in a 1982 Frank and Ernest cartoon by Robert Thaves. It was talking about Fred Astaire when one of the characters said, "Sure he was great, but don't forget that Ginger Rogers did everything he did...backwards and in high heels." Have you ever felt that way? We probably all have been in that space and most of the time we don't do it with the grace and ease of Ginger Rogers.

Backwards is not necessarily a negative! I read a story about a Yoga teacher who said to her class one afternoon during a downward facing dog asana:

Sometimes, you feel as though you are riding the bicycle backwards. You feel like you are backtracking and heading in the wrong direction, but really what’s happening is contraction and release. The universe is preparing you for something much greater and like a sling shot, it’s going to shoot you forward - you just have to move backwards for a little bit.

Let's remember what Friar Rohr said:

...we often enter liminal space when our former way of being is challenged or changed...

Transformation is about decision. A decision to stay in the dark or step into the light. Again, Rohr:

During this graced time we are not certain or in control. This openness allows room for something genuinely new to happen. We are empty and receptive--an erased tablet waiting for new words. Liminal space is where we are most teachable.

Sometimes, we sit in resistant to the yuckiness. Don't! Go ahead and be sad, disappointed, angry, etc. Let's say 45 seconds. Then take action ... inward!

Decide:  Do I want to experience a woe is me life or a wow is me life?

Decide:  Do I want to do it the hard way or the natural/organic way … the factory settings way?

Decide...per Ralph Waldo Emerson:

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.

What is "to be yourself" mean?

There's a story about caterpillar crawling to a wall. He looked each way, seeing what seemed like infinity. He looked up the wall, it was never-ending. Frustrated and angry, the caterpillar didn't know how to get over wall. He could try to crawl up the wall like some Navy Seal, but that would take a strength he did not possess. What was the caterpillar to do? Finally, in this liminal space, it decides to be patient, using the strategy of allowing its true self to emerge. He crawled up a nearby tree to contemplate. Two weeks later, the caterpillar true self emerged and just flew over the wall. It transformed by transcending through its true and authentic nature.

The trick, when you are in that liminal space -that graced time...the most teachable moment- is to stop and listen, stop working on the solution, the fix, or the how and commit to the what; and remember who you are...get back to the basics, the factory settings I wrote about last time.

Estelle Frankel, Berkeley psychotherapist & teacher of Jewish mysticism:

...if I take the time….to sit down, close my eyes, say a prayer, open myself to Spirit, then my identity begins to expand, and I remember that I’m not just Estelle, the personality, that I’m a soul, that I’m an embodiment of the Divine, and I move from what Jewish mystics say is ‘small mind’ to ‘big mind’ (also, the Buddha said that). And in that other state, the bonds of the self, the small identity that limits us and dictates who we think we are, it frees up – it’s sort of like a zooming out that you would do with a camera, but it’s zooming out all the way to infinity, all the way to eternity, beyond time, beyond space. And in that moment of deep meditation, or prayer, anything becomes possible, because you are rising above the workings of time.

You are allowing Self to re-emerge! A new you? Maybe...probably, but through the oldest of you … the eternal you … the Divine YOU!

The answer or treat may hide in so and so's books, but all are saying so much of the same thing in a new vernacular. Ideas like Thoughts are things, change your thinking/change your life, the Universe has your back, or by using the countdown method of Mel Robbins or the take dynamic/bold action ideas of Tony Robbins (no relation), through affirmative prayer and other spiritual practices; all are really ancient wisdom from all sorts of cultures, theologies, philosophies, ideas, etc. re-packaged.

There is a vibration, an energy that is always there to tap into; it's first step in these liminal space moments, in these times of transformation. It is there we can move any story of woe / chaos / indecision / loss of control / being off balance; any feelings of “what the hell am I doing and how the heck did I get here?” or the “What now???” to the state of wow:

There's a living Presence within and I recognize It as the One and Only Power in the Universe and I unify with It.

You are of IT and that cannot be taken away from you!!! So stop and listen! The Universe, it has the hows and the strategy you require to transcend the transformation, to allow the new you to emerge from the original you … to reanimate the Divine Intelligence that is seemingly lying dormant.

In that liminal space where you are the most teachable, go back to basics. Transform into who you already are! And that is:

You Are Powerful, Capable, Always at Choice, Open and Ready
Operating at the Speed of the Divine

At the Speed of Love!

...even backwards...in heels

Affirmation
Think, feel, believe and pray....that is what I am doing today.
Think, feel, believe and pray....deciding that this is a fabulous day.
I think, feel, believe and know my life shines bright through the thoughts I sow. 
Within, I declare and reveal my best, optimized from this day forward, from now to the rest.
Dancing into a life so full, I surround myself with love, kindness, wisdom, creativity and vitality....nurturing my body, mind and soul with goodness, laughter, and gratitude.
Hallelujah!